Ladies, we’ve all been there before. We’re in a relationship with a guy who we absolutely love and adore. We’re crazy over him, he feels the same about us and we can’t get enough of him. We tell ourselves he’s our future husband. We even visualize getting married, having babies, a white house and a picket fence. Then it seems as if one day everything goes south. We get that heartbreaking phone call, text message or inbox on Facebook that says he’s breaking up with you. I’ve been there, I know plenty of other females that been there and it’s no fun. Even if you eventually get over the pain, initially it’s treacherous. One of the worst things I hate about this scenario is when he then says - “can we at least remain friends?”
“Can we still be friends?” - is one of the most confusing questions I’ll never understand. If a guy wants to break up with you and feels it’s best to go separate ways then why stay in your life as a friend? This brings me to my million dollar question - does he really want to remain friends? I personally don’t believe a man and woman can honestly be platonic friends. Therefore, I definitely don’t think a man you were in a relationship with, in love with and possibly had sex with, can be just your friend. Why would he want to be your friend? Is it that he really wants to have his cake and eat it too? Does he plan on keeping you close for his own personal gain? Or does he just like the idea of always having you there as a plan b? Either way it’s selfish, unfair, cruel and manipulative. Bad enough he broke the poor girls’ heart. Now he wants to play games with it by telling her he wants to still be friends. I think that when a man says that he’s playing a game; and ladies when you fall for it you’re falling directly into his trap.
I understand some people will disagree with me both men and women. However, I have my reasons. First and foremost if you want to separate yourself from someone to one extent wouldn’t you want to separate yourself from them all ways around? Why put yourself in that awkward position? Why not make it easier on both parties and just part ways all ways around. Secondly, if she’s not good enough to be your girlfriend, what makes her so worthy of being your friend? My third reason is because of the confusion and mind games that come with that scenario. I know plenty of women who fall into the trap of staying friends and end up becoming more than a friend but never really a girlfriend. Or they end up constantly getting their heart broken by this man who keeps stringing them along. I, myself have been there. It’s easy to get caught up in that trap. But before you allow yourself to go there and risk getting hurt again just stop and think. Does he really want to remain friends? In their heart most females know the answer to that. Some even know the true intentions, but because she already has feelings for this man and want him in her life any way she can have him; she tells herself there’s nothing wrong with just being his friend. To the females that agree, enter at your own risk.
As for me, I learned from my mistakes.
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